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I'm a stylist and I lost my style mojo...

Have you ever lost your style mojo? I know what it’s like to lose your way, your sense of identity and your style mojo. It's often after a life transition, a challenge or simply being at the bottom of the list for so many years you have forgotten how to devote any time to yourself.

Life is busy and the last few years have seen us pivot and change in exceptional circumstances to new ways of working, living and being - it's no wonder some of are feeling lost or simply don't know what to wear any more. And I get it, I really do...

I'm a stylist and I lost my style mojo!

For me it happened a few years after having my children and those years had been really eventful, stressful and included immense change. We had moved areas and homes, living in a rented house which I had never seen as our rental fell through just two days before moving house (hideous with two young kids!) managing a major house renovation of a total wreck, which almost bankrupted us and Ieaving my much-loved career to focus on my family. Christ, it’s no wonder I lost myself in the midst of all that craziness?!

I look back now I've written this and wonder how I coped with two very lively kids under 2 years 🤣 and a husband working full-time in a new job he hated (which sadly is part of the reason we had moved to this area) Utter Madness. But we did it and we still live here and love this house, so it was absolutely worth it! We can all do hard things but it sometimes comes at the expense of something else.

For me it was my sense of self, style and identity which are so inextricably linked. I didn’t know how to dress myself any longer - having come from a corporate background with lots of events hosting I had always been smartly dressed which had become a uniform and it was safe and reliable. I'd also put on an enormous amount of weight and felt completely cast adrift as there was no respite from the humdrum of crawling across a building site with two kids everyday.

Once the house was complete and we’d moved in and got the children into some sort of routine I began to think about myself and what a new career might look like and what skills I could ignite. I'd been talking with my family about re-training but not having the confidence to do it and my cousin who's a lot younger than me, simply said 'You've lost your mojo and you need it back, I'm taking you shopping!'

I was initially taken aback when she suggested shopping as I had been trying to lose weight and just felt it wasn't worth it - how wrong I was! So I left the kids with my Mum for the day and off we went. I felt utterly lost and so confused about what suited me, my new body and how to spend time on myself without feeling guilty and had a moment of panic and tears in the changing room. My cousin said to me ‘It’s ok to want to look and feel great right now as you are - we just need to re-discover YOUR style mojo’

And we did. I bought clothes with her kick-ass support and encouragement to suit my new body, my current lifestyle which were still ‘me’ just the new version of me that was evolving. I left feeling ELATED and excited about my new style and my confidence literally sky rocketed!!

That experience taught me so much about the relationship between the way I wanted to feel in my clothes and the way I dressed which wasn't reflecting the real me, so there was a major disconnect. I hadn't known what my style was prior to that days shopping yet I put my trust in my cousin and just tried things on to see how it looked and felt and gradually I found my style mojo again. It felt really empowering and I literally felt years younger, pounds lighter and like I could rule the world!

It’s powerful stuff and creates lasting impact in your day to day life, I promise you! Since that day I re-trained and started a business creating beautiful window displays, I created, owned and run a womenswear boutique and website, re-trained as a Personal Stylist gaining a coveted Distinction, become a Body Shape Expert, featured in the national press and the BBC, am a course leader for The London College of Style, have my own radio show and podcast and a career I adore!!

So take the time for you - you are worth it, you deserve it and it’s an act of kindness to yourself. The second element to this is that our style evolves and that’s ok - consider it part of your journey and evolution, there are no prizes for rushing to the destination! So enjoy it.

If this Blog resonates with you I’d love to talk with you - I get it. And I also know how INSPIRED, joyful and connected you will feel the other side of working with me as your stylist and cheerleader!

Your style is part of you - let’s connect you with your true style story.

Abbey x

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